Saturday, October 01, 2005

I was not properly warned about motherhood

Note To Self: when the bathroom smells really good it is because one of your very expensive hair products has been used by your son as part of some game he his playing while bathing.

You would think after so many years of this behavior, I wouldn't be surprised when my son plays with my always-expensive hair products. I often say my son is a "funny little guy" but what I mean by that is that he is often unexplainable, odd, & downright weird.

At perhaps the age of 2 or so, he started emptying mass amounts of not only my hair products, but his own shampoo & bubble bath, into his bath. I started taking all the stuff out of the bathtub before he got in but he figured out he could get out to rummage the bathroom for fun, yummy smelling stuff. He has explored many options over the years; recently he found it fun to spray the air freshener all over the mirror.

Here's the thing. This is an expensive and messy behavior. I don't clean my house much as it is so cleaning up unneccessary messes is SO out of the question.

I punish him. I make him give me money from his piggy bank. I make him get out of the bathtub early. I make him go to bed early. I lecture him. I talk incessantly about my frustration. And the thing with punishing him is that it usually punishes me too. Taking away TV or toys or hog-tying him to his bed makes MY life more difficult. Yes, that sounds stupid.

Of course parenthood is difficult and takes time and energy and is a full-time, thankless job. I knew that or so I thought! What I didn't understand is that there ARE NO words to actually describe parenthood.

And to think I actually applied for this job. I signed up for it. I signed the contract. I "prepared" for it. I studied for it.

Note To Self: tell future parents that there are no preparations, no books, no words that adequately describe parenthood. It's a learn-as-you-go job.

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