How I knew I was on a cruise

I knew I was on a cruise because...........

* there was A LOT of food
* i was swimming in ocean water....in a pool
* everyone was drinking by noon
* my hair was frizzy
* we had our own personal maitre d', who put my napkin on my lap every night for dinner
* there was a karoke bar, a disco, a casino, a coffee bar, and a duty-free shop next door to each other
* i drank too many rum and coke's to count and I still wasn't drunk
* i was unsteady on my feet and I wasn't drunk
* the boat was a' rockin' and they still came knockin'
* there was a lot of yummy food
* my cell phone said "searching..........." for days
* when I got off the boat, there were Mexican trinkets everywhere
* there were towels shaped into animals on my bed everynight..........along with a mint

And this how I know I'm HOME from my Mexican Cruise:
* no one is putting my napkin on my lap for me
* no one is serving me dessert
* my cell phone is ringing
* i have to watch the clock, not so I know when to eat, but to make sure I pick my child up from school
* i have 100 pictures to edit and download and upload and share on kodakgallery
* i got on the scale
* i went to the gym
* there is work to be done